Botchland Uber allies

That didn’t last long did it. The Conservatives’ newly found Brexit unity has gone up in flames faster than a Samsung Galaxy Note 7. Despite the claims on the Tory benches on Friday that Theresa May had won a great victory for Britain by conceding everything that the EU had been demanding in the first place, by Saturday the EU was saying that there is as much chance of Britain getting a special bespoke preferential trade deal as there is of Michael Gove getting awarded Best Friend of the Year Award. Mikey is such a backstabber that he can’t even get a Tesco loyalty card. The ink wasn’t even dry on the EU agreement before Mikey was telling everyone that voters could elect a future government that could negotiate different terms. Presumably he was referring to a government in which he plays a leading role. And there’s a reason for Scottish independence all by itself.

Brexit is like being stuck in a lift with that guy from the breakaway Unionist froth group Unity going on about the fantastic opportunities Scotland’s got in the Union, horribly wrong on so many levels. That’s the guy who recently put out a wee video responding to the slagging off he was getting online which basically boiled down to saying “Stop hiding and come and have a chat face to face, foul separatists”. Or in other words, meet yese behind the bike sheds if you think you’re hard enough. No wonder he was just one froth too far even for the spittle flecked corporate lobbyists of Britain in Union.

The best bit of the video however was his gloriously delusional belief that people who are supporting Brexit are opposing the elite. That’s the Brexit which is supported by Boris Johnson, Liam Fox, and Michael Gove and the right wing of the Tory party. You know, those challengers of the global elites. As for likes of yours truly, I’m too busy hiding behind my real name and globally eliting up a close in the East End of Glasgow to have any sense of what might truly be exercising ordinary working class communities. Still, at least a right wing dysfunctional post-Brexit Britain where the only people to flourish will be the owners of global taxi companies which insist their employees aren’t employees at all can have a new national anthem, Botchland Uber allies.

The real problem for the British state is that the people who actually have power and influence aren’t any less delusional than some random guy on the internet. Former Territorial SAS sodgie David Davis already had the kind of reputation that you can only get when your sole area of expertise is garotting Her Majesty’s enemies with piano wire, but only at weekends. Now he’s also got a reputation that makes Walter Mitty seem like a hard headed realist. Just a few days after the deal was reached with the EU, the one that the entire Tory cabinet was lauding as the greatest political achievement since Theresa May managed to get through a speech without howking up phlegm, David is saying that after all Britain maybe won’t have to pay the £39 billion that it has agreed to cough up to the EU.

The Brexit secretary doesn’t think that the deal reached last week is legally enforceable. Speaking on the Andrew Marr Show on Sunday morning, Dave said that the deal was just a serving suggestion. Directly contradicting the Chancellor Philip Hammond who described the financial settlement as an obligation, Dave insisted that both the financial settlement and the Irish border agreement are conditional on Michael Gove getting a Tesco loyalty card and the UK getting that bespoke preferential trading deal which the EU is insisting is an impossiblity.

This kind of Perfidious Albionness is precisely why the Irish government had insisted that the agreement reached between the UK and the EU last Friday needed to be “politically bullet proof” and “cast iron”. The Irish know better than anyone else that the British government can’t be relied on to keep its word. It’s not for nothing that the Irish have always claimed that the only reason that the sun never set on the British Empire was because God doesn’t trust the British in the dark. Now David Davis has proven that the British government can’t be trusted in the daylight either.

But then here in Scotland we’ve learned that lesson the hard way. Remember that binding and legal commitment that the permanence of the Scottish Parliament was going to be enshrined in law so that no Westminster government could change or alter the powers of Holyrood without the consent of the Scottish parliament? Remember the Vow? Remember all the promises of jobs and security and stability? Remember how we were told that the only way Scotland could remain a part of the EU was by voting to stay a part of the UK? Oh how we laughed. The UK still fondly imagines that in its dealings with Ireland it can act in the exact same way that it has acted with Scotland. It likes to think that it has all the power and all the cards, and the Irish like the Scots have no option but to put up and shut up and bow to Her Majesty’s government. The delusional Brexiteers are in for a very big disappointment. In these negotiations the Irish are backed up by the other members of the EU. They won’t be fobbed off with a Vow.

The lesson for Scotland ought to be clear. As a part of the UK our voice can be silenced, we have no redress when the British government goes back on its word. If Scotland wants to get something out of the British government, the only way to do so is from a position of strength, and that means as an independent state which can form partnerships and make allies with other states in its own interests. We’ll get precisely nothing as a satrapy of Botchland’s Uber allies.


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0 thoughts on “Botchland Uber allies

  1. Thanks Paul, I enjoyed that.

    It’s almost as if the blighters have swallowed their own propaganda. No, it’s EXACTLY like that. ;o)

  2. Pingback: “Botchland Uber allies” | Wee Ginger Dug | COMRADE BOYCIE: VIVA THE ANTI-TORY/DUP REVOLUTION!

  3. It is a plain as the nose on your face the unionists parties are out to destroy Scotland.and will go to any lengths to
    Do it.they will lie. Deceive.deny.no
    Matter the issue.it is snp.bad.and for
    All those that are quite willing to be ruled
    By an English Westminster.government.
    You will realise when it is to late.and
    You will get what you deserve.you will
    Be kept under the thumb for ever.
    Please wake up Scotland.we owe
    It to ourselves.get out of this discredited
    Union.now.

  4. Thanks for another brilliant piece. It had me chuckling, which was something I badly needed. However, we really really need to get out of this megaclusterfuckmageddon.

  5. David Davis…. dear, oh dear, oh dear.

    Twenty seven nations. Twenty seven economies. Twenty seven governments. Home of the ECJ and the ECHR. One massive trading block.

    But Mr Davis (proven liar) reckons the current deal struck can’t or won’t be legally enforced…. HUH!

    It’s a Barney Bear moment isn’t it?

    • Sam, I think that this man is constantly ‘under the weather.’
      Every time he appears on the box, he adopts a louche drawl and slouches and mumbles like a bar room lawyer chewing on the leg of his specs, his eyes wandering heavenward one minute, downwards staring wide eyed at the Axminster the next, as he tries to avoid admitting that he and his Mighty Mandarins have done fuck all work in preparation for Brexit negotiations.
      I suspect his bored ennui is to fool us all into thinking that he has everything under control and that we ‘little people’ are worrying about nothing.
      It is all going to our anticipated time frame. By January, the Brexshit will hit the fan, at which time we fire the Indyref 2 starting gun, finish line October 2018.
      The Blue Tories are an unbelievably bad bunch of Bunglefucks, are they not?
      Bunglefucks, I like that.

      • I rather like ‘Bunglefucks’ myself, Jack. And you are right – DD’s air of ennui is like looking at a swan on a lake – serenity personified on the surface and paddling like feck underneath! Watching the implosion of the UK will be vastly entertaining … providing always that we are watching from the outside!

      • Irish PM Mr Varadkar wasn’t slow on the uptake either.

        HERE

        It’s as simple as this. If you vote Conservative, you vote in the FULL knowledge that you put others in harms way. If you vote Labour, then vote vote for those who support exactly the same system and practice of politics. The Libs are merely Santa’s little helpers.

        They lie with impunity simply because they know there will be no punishment, no holding to account. Tory Impact reports, Labour’s SNP badness on powwweeeerrrs, the Libdems’s Frenchgate the tip of the iceberg and not one of them will ever see punishment of any description. No sanctions, no loss of post, barely so much as a slap on the wrist.

        People want different politics? Better politics? Then they better get their thumb out and go make some, because the bastards that run our politics right now, and that includes the sainted Corbyn, seem pretty comfortable with things just exactly the way they are.

  6. Well if the EU, and Ireland, had asked us in Scotland given our experience of the Vow in 2014 we could have told them never to believe anything that Tories in Government in Westminster say or write. “My word is my bond” – what a joke: not now, perhaps never, in BritNat land.

    It is why any offer of a deal from the BritNat establishment for Scotland – any middle-way federal or other fudge, anything short of independence – could not and should not be trusted or accepted.

    • So, basically David Davis is telling the EU27 that the UK and everything the government signs up to can’t be trusted. If they really think they’ll get away with such a strategy, they will be in for a rude awakening I guess. Perfidious albion as usual, but interesting to realize that people like Davis and Gove consider the concessions made by the UK to the EU last friday as “not binding” & “meaningless” when it suits them. Unbelievable!

        • … honesty is one issue, integrity another one plus DD is apparently not the brightest candle on the Christmas tree.

          Davis could at least have waited with his stupid statements until the MEP’s in Brussels have voted and given their consent to move to phase 2 of the negotiations. The whole thing can still collapse like a shaky house of cards. If they don’t honour their agreements, nobody will trust the government of the UK and so far they have not done much to prove they are trustworthy partners in the negotiations.

          Imho the Irish were absolutely right and had apparently very good reasons why they insisted on a written assurance/guarantee from the UK-government on the border issue…

  7. I like to think I have a more than fair grasp of the english language, but I had to consult a dictionary for the word ‘satrapy’…………good word.

  8. Chucked and gaffawed all the way through and a much needed tonic after a City Xmas shopping day. Seems as each day unfolds and ‘Brexit Negotiations are settled and onto next round’ are reversed. The Tory government has lost all it’s credibility and my question is ‘why would anyone choose to remain governed by a duplicitous, tyrannical, contemptuous foreign country’ Saor Alba Gu Brath 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁳󠁣󠁴󠁿

  9. Great piece Paul Thank you.

    Looking forward to the many Brit Nat debates after Indy ref 2 gun is fired, just imagine the ammunition the SNP ,GREENS or any other pro independence parties will have , I would love to see Lesley Riddoch tear into Rape clause Ruth or Wee Willie” Scottish police are bad ” Rennie.

    Alex Salmond must be thinking its Chrismas everyday hearing all the Jackie Baillie from these lying Tory plooks , he has enough material for another 50shows. Its Nae wonder Scots have developed our unique humour after listening to this Tory never ending P—H.

  10. No sooner was Davies acting like a professional idiot on TV when the EU made it known that other countries out with the EU are making it clear that the UK must get no special deal. We must be treated the same as them. A third party state.

    Rumours have started to circulate that the brexiteers are going to rebel against it, the great phase one epiphany. The Beeb even mentioned last Friday that no brexiteers wrote and congratulatory tweets to our glorious PM.

    They have already started the same unbelievable crap about a rosy future when they know, at least I hope they do, that there is not going to be one.

    Sadly I know a couple of people who are so desperate to leave the EU dictatorship that they support this process. Oh no!, I have made a mistake as following a process implies having a plan.

    Note that the EU have stated that they hope that the UK will come to phase two talks with a clear and detailed statement of the deal we wish. No chance of that. As Davies said the Canada deal with plus, plus, plus and wait for it, no tariffs. Taking strong wacky minutes before a Beeb interview has impressive results. Twat.

    • Well said Sir! If I took on a contract and did fuck all for a year and a half, I’d expect the bum’s rush. Davis is on the payroll with a fat pension to boot.

  11. “Still, at least a right wing dysfunctional post-Brexit Britain where the only people to flourish will be the owners of global taxi companies ”

    At last we see what Nietzsche might have really meant by the oft speculated upon term ‘Übermensch’.

    Mr Davis’s latest position and a rarely found fragment of logic within the Brexit debacle, becomes one where legislation could be passed such that acquisition of ‘The Knowledge’ is no longer a licensing requirement for cabbies. Simples.

    Mr Davis himself, of course, having amply demonstrated his own expertise in the non acquisition of knowledge.

  12. Now according to DD the deal is “more than legally enforceable”. So it’s one of those more than legally enforceable but not binding deals then – is that the constructive ambiguity he was on about!! Perhaps DD has some from of short term memory loss as he can’t get the same story out two days in a row, or is it only non binding on a Sunday but legally enforceable the rest of the week. We all thought Yes Minister was very clever and perhaps nearer the truth than we cared to admit, but none of us thought it was actually a premonition of the time when the dunderheids had actually taken over the Government.

  13. I’m starting to think that maybe Theresa May isn’t the hapless clown she’s been acting like since becoming leader of her party. She claims she wanted the UK to remain within the EU, then employs awared-winning and acclaimed halfwits as the leading agents for exiting.

    David Davis, Liam Fox and Boris Johnstone are unlikely to be employed by anyone hoping for success in any given field. They can’t help themselves: they just don’t have the capacity to operate at high levels in the world of adults.

    Meanwhile, May sits back, lets her trio and the nutters in the DUP make international arses of themselves, and comes out of the whole debacle looking less foolish than they do. When we remember that Toryism is all above personal advancement and nothing to do with the good of the country, it all makes sense.

    • I think that I first called them the Darling Duds of May September 2016.
      Brexit was always going to be a spectacular failure when Johnson Gove Fox and Davis emerged as the Crack YooKay Team.
      Bunglefuckers of the first order every one of them.

    • Now that does begin to make some sense, in the absence of any other even vaguely logical explanation. I couldn’t decide if I was watching a remake of Yes Minister or one of the old Carry On films, but I hadn’t gone back quite far enough, to my childhood Saturday film shows. What we’ve got clearly had to be nothing less than The Three Stooges 🙂
      Pass the popcorn …

  14. David Davis said on LBC Radio a coulee of hours ago ““I said this was a statement of intent, which was much more than just legally enforceable.”

    Is it me, or is that good old-fashioned gibberish?

    • Les, this man would try and sell you a nuclear fall out shelter with a three year guarantee.
      He actually believes that he does not need to be clever to do the EU Brexit job.
      I’d imagine that he would go down into the boiler room of a tanker smoking a Havana. The man is that brainless, he is actually unaware of the harm he is doing.
      That’s probably why the London Establishment insisted that he head the team.
      Brexit will collapse soon.

      The Money Men are just making sure of it.

      We must be ready January ’18.
      And yes, we need international supervision of the Postal Vote.
      Thanks for the Dunoon Unit Report, Les.

      Another pint of the Dark Stuff, down your way this time, early in the New Year?

      • Jack, a continuation of our discussion over another pint is a good idea. A bar near me, opened in 1910, has a coal fire and character.

        • Sounds like a plan, Les.
          As we approach the winter solstice, my spirits rise. The nights in the last week of December grow shorter as we nudge slowly out of winter.
          Pie, pint, corn beef legs huddling round the fire, talking rebellion and freedom yet to be: sounds idyllic, sir.
          Putting up the tree today…
          Next Christmas every home in Scotland will erect the Tree of Liberty.
          The Chief’s love and protection to you and yours, Les.

    • He seems be Under The Weather quite a lot, not to mention Tired And Emotional.

      “Double scotch, steward! Chop chop.”

    • ‘Twas the fortnight before Brexmas, and all through the House, Treeza waffled for an hour and a half, basically arguing that if David Davis doesn’t like the Trade Deal proffered by the EU in October 2018, then all bets were off; No Deal was better than Bad Brexit.
      Not that firm ‘bets’ were ‘on’ with regard to the £40 billion divorce bill, the right to remain and work of 3 million EU citizens in the UK, and incidentally the million Brits working, settled, or retired in the EU, and the SM CU soft border between the North and South of Ireland.
      She returned from Brussels with her tail betwixt her legs, having conceded everything to the EU27.
      Or not,perhaps.
      She wrote an open letter to the EU 3 million declaring that she would really like them to stay.
      Aye right.
      However if there is No Deal by October ’18, and England welches on the Divorce Bill, the corollary of which is that she will be writing to the EU 3 million advising them that she’d really like them to leave, and the Irish Government will be instructed by HMG to build a Brexit Wall hemming in their six Northern Counties in Britland.
      And now the Rand Corporation, the CIA Think Tank, is warning that any form of Brexit will be a financial, political, military, and social disaster for England and Wales, we find that we are where we have been saying we are all along, heading over a financial social and political cliff, led by May Johnson Davis and Fox, with Gove, Rudd ,Hammond, and the alleged sex pests bringing up the rear, so to speak.
      Jan ’18 begins indyref2 campaign.
      I refuse to let and English Parliament destroy Scotland.

  15. WGD, please use “BritAss” and “BreckShit” instead of the more obscene English Traditionalist alternatives…

    Using their language is showing them far too much respect and increases exposure to their confidence trick terminology…

    We need to “divest”…

    • I had to get help from Google regarding the meaning of ‘Satrapy’ in Pauls comments above. However I am now flummoxed by Jacks new word ‘Bunglefuckers’. No where in any lexicon or thesaurus is it found, not even mighty Google can help.

      But Jack you are a wordsmith. Bungle means ‘carry out (a task) clumsily or incompetent’ and fucker means ‘a contemptible or stupid person (often used as a general term of abuse)’ and is a vulgar term used by many.

      So Jack it does define the Cabinet perfectly and the Brexiteers superbly. Well done you.

  16. He seems be Under The Weather quite a lot, not to mention Tired And Emotional.

    “Double scotch, steward! Chop chop.”

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