The lies that will consume the Tories


Thanks to voters in the rest of the UK, the Conservatives might win this General Election, but in the long term they’re going to lose. They’re going to destroy themselves as a party, and they’re going to destroy that so-called precious union that they keep banging on about. Within a couple of years of their victory, if not sooner, they will face a backlash of disgust, odium, and contempt from the very people who vote for them on Thursday. If the Conservatives win a majority on Thursday, it will signal the death warrant of the UK.

The Tories are a party who are running on empty. In the rest of the UK they bang on with the single message of getting Brexit done. In Scotland they are monomaniacal in their opposition to another independence referendum. Apart from that, they are content free in this election, yet even those two key promises that they’re making are promises founded upon lies. In this election the Tories are the zombie party. They’re still walking, still moving about, but they’ve long since become brain dead and are starting to rot.

The Conservatives cannot deliver on getting Brexit done. The phrase implies a finality, a promise that if the deliberately tousled liar is returned to Downing Street with a majority, that the UK can put Brexit behind it and return to some semblance of normality. You know, like when the most notable thing that happened in British politics was when David Cameron was accused of shagging a dead pig’s head. But get Brexit done is a lie. It’s a lie because Brexit is not merely the process of leaving the EU, but the end state of being outside of it. Brexit isn’t over on 31 January. It’s only just beginning. It’s a lie because the Tories are telling people to vote for them in order to get a resolution to Brexit, to get Brexit done and dusted, to make it go away and stop it from being the topic which dominates British politics. But that’s not going to happen.

Assuming that there is a Tory majority, the 31st of January merely signals the start of complex negotiations on the final relationship between the UK and the EU. They will dominate the news all next year, there will be the same dramas, the same approaching cliff edge. There will be an even higher risk of no deal, as there will be nothing to restrain Boris Johnson as he seeks to appease the swivel eyed free market Brextremists who now dominate the Conservative party. 2020 will be characterised by Brexit and arguments about Brexit every bit as much as 2019, as 2018, as 2017, as 2016. Brexit will deform UK politics for years to come.

In this election the Conservatives are playing the mirror image of the same linguistic trick that is played by the likes of Scotland in Union when they refer to independence as separatism. It’s like saying that emigrating to another country is all over and done with as soon as you pass through the queue at the airport. Only in the case of Brexit the final destination is a dysentry infested cess pit where you’ll have to pay through the nose for health care and the only job you’ll be able to find is on a zero hours contract, and as you go to your job which offers you no employment rights or protection, you’ll pass foodbanks, young people begging on the streets, and bailiffs on their way to evict tenants from private rented accommodation that they can no longer afford.

The reality of Conservative rule was unwittingly revealed by Boris Johnson when ITV’s Joe Pike showed him a photo of a four year old with suspected pneumonia who was left lying on the floor on a pile of coats in an A&E department in Leeds. Johnson waffled on about getting Brexit done, and – carefully out of camera shot – put the reporter’s phone in his pocket. It was only when he was challenged on camera about putting the reporter’s phone in his pocket that he was forced to confront the issue. And then we just got more waffle, more waugh fnaugh fnaugh waugh, more hums, haws, and getting Brexit done. In this brief episode Boris Johnson managed to demonstrate something that had previously been thought to be impossible. He showed that he was even more robotic and lacking in basic humanity than Theresa May.

If you’re a Conservative in Scotland, you’re voting for the end of the unionism you profess to hold dear. A Boris Johnson majority government will create anger and disgust in Scotland equal or greater to that generated by Margaret Thatcher, and you know how that ended for you. When Margaret Thatcher first came into power, Scotland was pretty much evenly divided on whether it wanted devolution. By the end of her rule devolution was the settled will of the Scottish people. Boris Johnson came to power when Scotland was pretty much evenly divided on whether it wanted independence. His government will transform the desire for independence into the settled will of the Scottish people. Be careful what you wish for, Scottish Tories. Enable Boris Johnson at your peril, because by doing so you are signing the death warrant of traditional Scottish unionism.

Vote Conservative if you don’t care about the truth. Vote Conservative if you are OK with public services being chronically underfunded while the rich get tax cuts. Vote Conservative if you don’t mind stepping over a teenager sleeping rough in a shop doorway. Vote Conservative if you’re fine with disabled people suffering cuts to their already meagre incomes. Vote Conservative if you think it’s a good thing that people have to go hungry and trudge to foodbanks in the cold in order that a charity can give them food for their kids. Vote Conservative if you are happy to see more children living in poverty. Vote Conservative if you have no social conscience. Vote Conservative to enable the cruelty and lack of compassion of the entitled posh boy who lies to you and refuses to be held to account. Vote Conservative if you want to reward a lack of empathy, compassion and humanity. Vote Conservative if you’re a turkey voting for Christmas. Vote Conservative for a lie that will consume you.

You can help to support this blog with a Paypal donation. Please log into and send a payment to the email address Or alternatively click the donate button. If you don’t have a Paypal account, just select “donate with card” after clicking the button.
Donate Button

If you have trouble using the button, or you prefer not to use Paypal, you can donate or purchase a t-shirt or map by making a payment directly into my bank account, or by sending a cheque or postal order. If you’d like to donate by one of these methods, please email me at and I will send the necessary information.

Please also use this email address if you would like the dug and me to come along to your local group for a talk.

GINGER2croppedGaelic maps of Scotland are available for £15 each, plus £7 P&P within the UK for up to three maps. T-shirts are £12 each, and are available in small, medium, large, XL and XXL sizes. P&P is £5 for up to three t-shirts. My books, the Collected Yaps Vols 1 to 4 are available for £11 each. P&P is £4 for up to two books. Payment can be made via Paypal.

newbook My new book has just been published by Vagabond Voices. Containing the best articles from The National from 2016 to date. Weighing in at over 350 pages, this is the biggest and best anthology of Wee Gingerisms yet. This collection of pieces covers the increasingly demented Brexit years, and the continuing presence and strength of Scotland’s independence movement.

You can order the book directly from the publisher. Ordering directly means that postage is free. You can order here –

You can also order a book directly from me. The book costs £11.95 and P&P is an additional £3.50, making a total of £15.45. To order just make a Paypal payment to, or alternatively use the DONATE button below. Please make sure to give me your postal address when ordering. Orders to be sent outwith the UK will incur extra postage costs, please email me for details. If you can’t use Paypal, or prefer an alternative payment method, please email

22 thoughts on “The lies that will consume the Tories

  1. Oh dear the wheels on the bus are getting a wee bit shoogly , it just might be finally folk are starting to catch Boris the Lying bar stuard out , Hankocks half hour must have been whisked to the Hospital by Helicopter or Jet to where the Photo of that little lad was taken .I hope the boy has recovered by the way .

    This is Damage Control on a Grand Scale , you can almost hear Malcolm Tucker of in the thick of it fame Screaming blue bloody murder in Downing Street .

    As for the other Clown Swansong seems she got her arse skelpt live on TV ch 4 by Dr Philippa Whitford and audience members regarding her voting record one called her a Tory in disguise when commenting why there were no Brexit or Tory on the panel , I get it now they sent a replacement in the guise of the Libdem Leader .

    As Paul has pointed out the lies will bite them all on the Arse about time Too .Still a few days left for them to make total Arses of themselves, I bet they wish it was over before it gets any worse , The only way to save Boris is to kidnap the Clown .

    • It’s arguable that even the fictional Malcolm Tucker would be so inept as to deal with the debacle in Leeds in the way in which Kuensberg and the Mail did by posting unverified second hand hearsay accusations of LP members assaulting a Tory staffer and then having to rapidly backtrack when video was released showing the staffer walking into the finger of a gesticulating cyclist.

      Unfortunately, most people seem to be content with believing any old bullshit so long as it confirms their own prejudices or gang allegiance.

  2. When you lay it out like that, Paul, what decent god fearing Scot would vote to have Boris Johnson at the helm of the UK for five minutes never mind five years.

    Jackson Carlaw is backing a man who spits in the face of the people of Dunblane by likening the banning of guns in the UK to ‘nanny taking away toys’.

    It follows that Jackson Carlaw therefore will back legislation allowing anybody to buy handguns, the ‘toys’ of the psychopath?

    Nick Hancock looked completely defeated when he was forced to rush up to Leeds General today following the absolutely disgusting revelation that a four year old boy had to lie on his own jacket on the floor for 12 hours, with suspected pneumonia, because of Willie Rennie’s successful austerity measures to bring down the UK’s debt.

    How can any decent human being defend this man, never mind actively campaign to put him in charge of the UK?

    Tomorrow night on BBC MacKinnon, pigeon droppings, baby deaths, Nicola Sturgeon’s £15 billion ‘deficit’, ‘nobody wants another ‘divisive’ Indyref ‘ ‘will get full throttle on BBC Jockland’s ‘debate’, while 320,000 Scottish children live in Professor Two Jobs WATP (apparently not) Adam Tomkin’s state engineered poverty, and 500,000 Scots will queue at foodbanks this Christamas because we are obliged to pay for Richard Leonard’s PFI privatisation of 4 schools in Ayrshire, to name but a few PFI fiddles in Scotland under Labour, where an £80 millionbuild will bring in a £290 million return for offshore ‘investors’ who will pay hee haw in UK taxes, while kids go to school starving and destitute.

    Willie Rennie leads no one. He is an ‘Illiberal Undemocrat’ according to Brewer at the week end.
    He would deny Scots their democratic rights, while Swinson can’t even be bothered appearing Up Here to answer her critics, or face the electorate in leafy Berasden.

    BY any measure, these are seriously evil, and I mean evil, people.
    Scotland can do much better.
    Wonderful prose, Paul.

    • And as you say Jack, “Jackson Carlaw is backing a man who spits in the face of the people of Dunblane by likening the banning of guns in the UK to ‘nanny taking away toys’.

      It follows that Jackson Carlaw therefore will back legislation allowing anybody to buy handguns, the ‘toys’ of the psychopath?”

      sums the crap up to me and many others who are nearly local to Dunblane, who were immobilised in their horror and disbelief at the atrocities of that time.

  3. Thank you! This is about the only cheerful thing I’ve read re the election. All the same it takes some effort to believe the Tory cloud of piss ‘n’ wind might yet have a silver lining ,,, I suppose we can but hope

  4. Excellent Paul but please don’t associate my good surname with lyingbawbagjohnson’s waffling. All the Best. A proud Waugh

  5. Was it just me or did LBJ look like someone in search of some modern chemistry when he was confiscating the phone. (he can always be relied on to make me look suave and sophisticated) but this was really way more than the carefully crafted ill kept slob.
    Then the next news report he’s in he’s fresh make up and uncaractillistcaly (sic) tidy.

  6. The comments in this thread imply that this lying is something new. In democracies, right-wing parties need to lie, in order to conceal the true nature of their intentions and policies. Ultimately, these parties exist to preserve and expand the wealth and privileges of the richest 1% (or 10%). If they were honest about this, they would never get enough votes to be in power. The need to create believable (but false) stories, backed up by persuasive coverage in the media and personable candidates, that will convince ordinary non-wealthy people to believe them. This is fundamentally quite simple.

  7. The title of Paul’s excellent piece is “The lies that will consume the Tories”. Its not just lies. Its disregard and lack of interest. Very few of them are genuinely interested in the minsterial briefs that they have accepted. This is manifest in a lack of background information and historical perspective, limited grasp of detail, and absence of a human response to the reality of what they are dealing with (e.g., Johnson’s response to being asked to look at the photo of the boy on the A&E floor).

  8. They did not win the indy ref so much as gain a reprieve. It was up to them to prove the union was worth a toss. But they had “won” it cheaply & meanly, endorsing a Westminster vision of Scotland as eternal supplicant. But they never considered that they might, one day, have to defend from English Tories. Having “saved” their precious union by being on their knees and abasing themselves…hostage to fortune springs to mind.

    You really should have been careful what you wished for Unionists. You are going to get what you didnt want.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published.