Labour’s cycle of despair

What with the coronavirus, a certain trial, the ongoing omnigarbage that is the Boris Johnson government, and the fact that you really need to get around to cleaning the oven, it’s easy to forget the Labour party is currently in the middle of a leadership contest. Actually, that last sentence would also work if the full stop came immediately after ‘Labour party’. It would also work without the list of all the other topics that came before. In fact, it’s fair to say that most people have forgotten the Labour party, which over the past few months had had a lower public profile than Boris Johnson’s second favourite fridge.

At Prime Minister’s Questions, Jeremy Corbyn no longer gives even his previous semi-detached from reality contribution to the debate. He knows that no one, least of all any of the MPs from his own party, is interested in what he has to say, and increasingly he no longer bothers to pretend that he’s interested either. Meanwhile the three remaining candidates for the leadership, Keir Starmer, Lisa Nandy, and The Other One, battle it out in a contest that’s as exciting as being dragged around a drapery shop with yer maw when you’re six, being forced to wait while she examines a series of beige curtains for the spare room.

It is widely predicted that Keir Starmer will win the contest. Keir’s position on another Scottish independence referendum is basically to draw the beige curtains and pretend that nothing is happening in the hope that the whole issue will go away by itself. This more or less sums up the attitude of the Labour party in Scotland to just about everything that the Tories are doing. They are far more interested in opposing the SNP, who they can never forgive for having ‘stolen’ their voters in working class communities across Scotland.

Ian Murray, the MP for Red Morningside, is in the running for the party’s deputy leader position. That is, he is in the running in the same way that a guy who dresses up as Olaf the snowman from Frozen is in the running for a marathon, although the Olaf lookalike is rather more likely to get over the finish line. This comparison is unfair to the Olaf lookalike, since he’s probably doing it for charity, or at least for a laugh, both of which are reasons which contribute rather more to the sum total of human happiness than anything Ian Murray has ever done. Ian wears the permanent expression of a man who’s just realised that there is cat crap in his shoe, after he’s been wearing it for an hour.

Today Ian has complained that the beige curtain competition risks being upset by nasty and vile Scottish independence supporters. Although he’s not actually referring to the 40% or so of Labour voters in Scotland who express support for independence in opinion polls. Ian would very much prefer to pretend that none of those people existed. The problem with the Labour party in Scotland, in Ian’s estimation, is that it’s not opposing independence with enough union jackery and saying no. This is apparently confusing people who may be led to believe that the Labour party in Scotland is listening to voters.

What’s really got Ian’s goat is the possibility that the deputy leadership contest might be, in his words, hijacked by SNP and Green party supporters. Ian is worried that SNP and Green party supporters and members who are members of a trade union could have a vote in Labour’s leadership contest as members of an affiliated body. Ian says he’s a committed trade unionist, and as such believes in solidarity and democracy, just not where it concerns people who have a different opinion on Scottish independence. Ian is polling far behind the other contenders for the deputy leadership, but it helps to get your excuses in early.

Meanwhile the office manager of Labour’s branch office in Scotland, Rameses Lookasquirrell, has penned an opinion piece for the Scotsman in which he claims that the SNP has developed a sense of entitlement. This is something of a specialist topic for Roscoe Lostsupport, as the Labour party in Scotland knows a lot about having a sense of entitlement. Even though Labour has, much to Rigoberto Lumpsqueezer’s intense chagrin, been out of power in Scotland for 13 years now, it still believes that it can win its way back into the affections of voters by doing absolutely nothing at all to change and waiting for the voters to fall out with the SNP. Deep down in its soul, the Labour party in Scotland still believes that voters in Scotland owe it a natural allegience, and they’re just supporting a pro-independence party because they’ve temporarily lost their senses.

What the Labour party is incapable of facing up to is the lesson that hundreds of thousands of voters in Scotland have taken to heart. All the way through the 80s and for most of the 90s we trusted in the Labour party to save us from the Conservatives, only to get Tony Blair. Because the problem is that the Labour party can only save Scotland from the Conservatives when voters in England elect it into power, and voters in England will only vote for the Labour party when the Labour party dresses in Tory drag. And even then, in the next turn of the electoral wheel the electorate in England will merely return to the Conservatives, who will undo everything that Labour did in its period in office. Many of us in Scotland seek independence because we wish to break this sorry and depressing cycle.

Labour in Scotland, or elsewhere in the UK, has no solution to this damaging and destructive pattern. Instead they tell us to vote Labour while Labour apes the Conservatives in order to make itself electable in the rest of the UK, so it can be in office for a few years to mitigate the damage that the Tories have done and will do again once Labour falls from grace in Westminster – as it most assuredly will a few years down the line. Then the Labour party will ape the Conservatives all over again in order to get back into power. We’re already seeing it in the positions of the leadership contenders. Labour is now a Brexit party.

Meanwhile Scotland is trapped in Labour’s cycle of despair. That’s the truth that Labour in Scotland is unable to recognise. It will remain in the wilderness until it does, and until it becomes a proper Scottish Labour Party. We’ll achieve independence before that happens. Independence is the only way to break the cycle of despair.

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14 thoughts on “Labour’s cycle of despair

  1. Pingback: Labour’s cycle of despair | speymouth

  2. The Scottish ( sic ) Labour Party is the living ( almost ) embodiment of that old saying : –

    ” Doing the same thing over and over again and expecting a different result is the definition of madness ! ”

    …or is this the new motto of Scottish ( sic ) Labour ?

  3. I agree that an afternoon with your Ma in Telfords or Kelvin House picking curtain material was a technicolour entertainment compared to present day Labour Party and those who sail in her.
    Those of you who remember Telfords and Kelvin House take care!

    • Paul, ace as per.
      -“voters in England will only vote for the Labour party when the Labour party dresses in Tory drag.”

      I’m trying to be up to the minute topical here.

      Red Tories like ‘confirmed bachelor’ Murray don’t like it when Trades Union members who prefer Self Determination to eternal subjugation to and English Parliament, exercise their Labour Party rights and don’t vote for him as Deputy Moaner..

      As I type, roughly 50,000 of James Kelly’s innocent young men(sic) who are now not in danger of being branded criminals with the demise of the OBFA, have flooded pubs around Ibrox and are polluting the air with their germs, in the height of a pandemic.

      Thousands will be up to their knees in Fenian Blood, accordions will wheeze out favourite little ditties like ‘Fuck The Pope’, and Rule Britannia, and the nearest to a clinical hand wash most of the Faithful will get is if they accidentally spill some of their pint over their hands as the get ready to rumble.

      They will infest my city on so many levels, but are still wooed by Labour and Tory Brit Nats alike.

      On Sunday, we are to be further contaminated, with songs of Irish Rebellion, and the murder of UK citizens added to the vile mix.

      And the rest of us who live within a five mile radius of this filth, will be expected to lock our doors and windows, close the curtains, and not dare venture abroad until Monday morning at the earliest.

      This is Labour’s best bet. Their core vote.

      Bigots, zealots, the poorly educated masses, who are thankfully fewer and fewer in number with each passing year.

      For all those Duggers who support Cellik or Ranjurs, do not be offended.

      You stand next to these morons and knuckledraggers every second week end.

      Do I exaggerate?

      People will die so that they can watch a fitba’ match.

      It is reported that crowds over 500 will not be allowed, but not until Monday.
      For a fitba match?

        • In my view, such as it, it much more sinister that that ,JG.
          ‘England Versus Germany; a re-enactment of WWII.
          ‘The Dambusters’ and The Great Escape theme tunes will get big licks, as well as a lot of Union Jacks flying, and God Save their Germanic Queen bellowed out because they were all born Under a Union Star.
          Perhaps they have arranged a fly past by the Red Arrows..
          Will Adam WATP Professor Two Jobs Tomkins, and Murdo 7 times political Failure ‘The Queen’s Eleven’ Fraser be there, cheering on the Lads, as they drive back Johnny Furriner from England’s shores, just like their grandparents dun in ’45?

          Sally Magnusson opened tonight’s Distorting Scotland with the news that from Monday gatherings of more than 500 would not be permitted, but she assured us, not on health grounds, but to free up medial and police resources.
          So that’s ok then.
          For the next 72 hours the Coronavirus will take a break while the animals slurp their way across my city.

  4. The modern Labour Party stands for nothing, other than get its leaders into power.
    Why? Look at the Blair government–many ended up very rich, utilising their government contacts and insider knowledge into high end jobs.
    Their juggling act over the last four decades has lost them both support and more importantly, trust. They are living on borrowed time, opposing (badly) one of the worst Tory governments in history—and themselves forecasting a bad forthcoming election result.
    In Scotland, the first domino to fall, we have a party split split on Scotland’s right of self-determination—a party whose members all signed the Claim of Right.
    Then we have Union Jock Murray who seems to see himself as the Labour Ruth Davidson—-hahaha—-she has bigger testicles than were Ian.

    But he will can stand four-square alongside his Tory chums when we throw the dice again.
    “Union Jock” Murray the Red Tory, and “Union”Jack the Blue Tory.
    Spot the difference and win a fortnight in Mustique!

  5. 19. (of 20.)

    Onward Labour lemmings

    Onward Labour lemmings,
    Marching o’er the cliff,
    With the mark of Leonard,
    Leading them skew-whiff.
    Dick, the chief of numpties,
    Heads his band of woe;
    Forward into hist’ry:
    See those bampots go!


    Onward Labour lemmings,
    Marching o’er the cliff,
    With the mark of Leonard,
    Leading them skew-whiff.

    [With acknowledgements]

    Songs for the New Politics

  6. Most trade unionists do not vote Labour. No one does. Yesterday men Labour politicians are just a nondescript echo. No one cares.

    Some Trade unions funded the illegal wars. So much for internationalism. Breaking International Laws to kill and maim people.

  7. It’s truth and reconciliation time….I was once a Labour voter (1979, might have been 83 but I think I was away and missed the vote). I have been cured, never again will I be deceived by their lies, SNP since 92 (voted for Nicola Sturgeon, David Marshall won seat).

  8. Thanks for the reminder Paul. I had genuinely forgotten that Labour are still trying to find a leader. They haven’t got much to choose from. Murray as deputy would just confirm that. But they couldn’t be that daft could they?

    Between Blair and Saint Jeremy the unelectable they have imploded. I have no idea who good people in England can get behind to destroy the Tories.

    In Scotland, people have the meaningful alternative.

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