The performance artiste’s Orkney tour

The performance artiste whose stage name is Boris Johnson has rolled up in Orkney today with his end of the union clown show. Having seen his advisors – well, Michael Gove – do an impression of Edvard Munch’s painting The Scream because of the recent rise in support for Scottish independence and a growing appetite in England for the other nations of the UK to go their own way, Johnson has decided that he needs to do something. After being informed that Scotland is moving towards a substantial majority in favour of independence because most Scottish people can’t abide him, our part time Prime Minister has decided that what we really need is more of him, not less.

He’s like one of those lecherous auld drunks at a party who thinks that the reason you are not succumbing to his dubious charms is because he’s not pawing at you enough. The concept that he might do better by A) not being offensive, entitled and rank, and B) respecting you as a fellow human, being doesn’t enter into his head. There is no room in Boris Johnson’s ego for empathy. He is incapable of grasping that his attempts at a charm offensive are merely offensive.

Reports are that he went to Orkney because he thought that if he went far enough into the Arctic north he could dispense with the obligatory refridgerator. However Johnson was just continuing in the hoary old tradition of Conservative leaders who attempt to sell the alleged benefits of the United Kingdom to Scotland by dint of carefully minimising any possibility of coming into contact with actual Scottish people. The real reason he’s going to Orkney is because the islands contain a settlement called Twatt, and the part time Prime Minister and full time bloviator believes he’ll feel at home there. On his next trip he’ll be going to Fannyfield in Ross and Cromarty and The Bastard near the Mull of Kintyre, both of which are conveniently far away from where most of the Scottish population can be found.

Johnson started his love-in with Scotland by snubbing the Scottish First Minister, who only found out about his visit along with the rest of us when it was reported in the media. But it’s now become traditional for the Scottish Government only to discover what the British Government has got planned for Scotland by reading about it in the English press. This pattern is now so well-established that it to all intents and purposes substitutes for the Joint Ministerial Committee.  Did you know about the Joint Ministerial Committee? Because if you did you’re considerably better informed than Minister for the Union Alexander Boris de Pfeffel Johnson. You will all be feeling loved and wanted and leading within the UK now, as per a Better Together press release circa 2014.

Today we’re also seeing that other traditional feature of Prime Ministerial visits to the Scotchlandshire colony, Tory politicians and supporters sending tweets about how Scotland rejects nationalism, complete with a row of union flags and insisting the the Preciousssss Union™ has never been stronger. This was also the message from Johnson in a press release shortly before he embarked upon his Twatt pilgrimage. And indeed the Preciousssss Union™ has never been stonger in the exact same way that there’s no border between Scotland and England, the UK has a world beating contact and trace app, and the entire world looks up to the British Government as a shining example of what to do in a global epidemic.

The real fact of the matter, the fact that Boris Johnson either can’t or won’t face up to, is that what is driving the rise in support for Scottish independence is not that the SNP is making a compelling case for independence. As anyone who has even the vaguest  awareness of the Scottish independence movement knows it is currently dominated by complaints that the SNP is not doing nearly enough to get us to a referendum and to get us out of this dysfunctional mess of a UK. What’s really driving the rise in support for Scottish independence is the rise of rampant English nationalism – a rampant English nationalism which is being propagated by one Alexander Boris de Pfeffel Johnson and his pals in the Conservative party.  Johnson himself, with his upper class accent and the entitlement and privilege which drips from his fingertips, is the embodiment of the British establishment’s disdain for Scotland, of an English patrician attitude which regards Scotland as a possession, not an equal partner in a union. Never an equal partner in a union. Every time he opens his bumbling stumbling fnaugh-fnaughing mouth, he reminds us that Scotland was lied to in 2014.

What exactly did the Tories think was going to happen in Scotland, which was already restless and dissatisfied, when they rammed through the hardest Brexit possible without any consideration that Scotland had voted to remain. Moreover they did so without taking into account that Scotland had voted against independence in 2014 partly, some would say largely, on the understanding that voting against independence was the only way to ensure that Scotland remained a part of the EU – and the Conservatives themselves were amongst those who were prominent in making that promise. Yet ever since Scotland has been told that we rejected independence in 2014 and now we just have to suck it up and do as we are told. Every single time that Johnson opens his mouth and gushes his guff about the sunny uplands, about taking back control, about the UK becoming an independent state, he’s only reminding Scotland that he lied to us. No amount of carefully stage managed visits to a creamery in Orkney will stop that from being the case. The Tories knew what was likely to happen in Scotland, they just didn’t care.  Now they have no idea how to deal with the consequences of their own actions.

Meanwhile, as Big Chief Johnson attempts to distract us natives with pretty photo op baubles in lieu of any actual respect, the news from the EU is that the UK is not being serious in negotiations about a trade deal. According to Michael Barnier there is no willingness from the UK to break the deadlock on a deal over fisheries or on the need to achieve a level playing field in trade with Europe.  We are staring at the very real possibility of a no deal Brexit at the end of this year, adding to the economic damage which the UK has already suffered as a result of the pandemic.  Economic damage which is the worst in Europe according to the OECD, something which is entirely the fault of Johnson and the Conservatives.

While Johnson wastes his time and ours on a meaningless trip to a part of Scotland where he can be carefully insulated by his minders from any contact with the realities of this country, his government continues to make the real case for Scottish independence. He’s a prime minister who tells the UK that it’s awful in a union where the people are not listened to or represented, and then he comes to Scotland to tell us how great it is to be in a union where we are not listened to or represented. He is so wrapped up in himself that he can’t imagine that we’ll ever spot the hypocrisy. It’s Tory hypocrisy and Tory lies which spell the end of the UK. Scotland is not going to be reconciled to Johnson’s lies, deceit, and contempt for Scotland because he flew to Orkney in order to pose for a photo op with a large crab.

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166 thoughts on “The performance artiste’s Orkney tour

  1. Two very different priorities.

    1. The FM of Scotland Is focusing on the health and well being of the people of Scotland.

    2. The PM of the UK is focussing on keeping the people of Scotland as prisoners of the UK.

  2. LBC James O’Brien and Shelagh Fogarty radio programmes had call ins on Boris Johnson’s visit to Scotland and calls very very interesting. Although Fogarty pushing Ruth Davidson as a big loss to Scottish Conservatives and the union. But callers – other than Andrew Bowie, Scottish Conservatives all pretty philosophical that Scotland has right to go own way – and some very interesting stuff particularly from callers south of border.

    Paul, you should have called into these shows – because the unionists still only having ‘was agreed once in a generation’ as their main defence against right to have a referendum. Would have been good for down south callers to have the benefit of hearing yourself on the wider vision of independence. I suspect unionists will be wanting to resurrect Ruth Davidson – but unionists don’t seem to realise how old and past the Ruth Davidson to save the union argument is.

    Hope some people listened into LBC today – because it was quite a comfortable listen for Yessers.

    Discussion is still ongoing – people wonderfully pointing out ‘once in a generation’ was not in the text of the Edinburgh Agreement vs Andrew Bowie continuing to imply it was.

    Get phoning in people. Shelagh Fogarty programme on until Eddie Mair starts at 4pm. Go on Paul. Get on there.

    • I was listening to the James O’Brien show on LBC at 10am as I was working from home. I was fully prepared for it to be a full on foaming Scottish Toryfest and for me to consequently be shouting at it. I was very very surprised for it to be pretty much the total opposite – No voters detailing why they would vote Yes now and some very articulate arguments for independence. Bear in mind its a London based radio station. I promised myself a good bottle of malt whisky if we won another independence referendum. I’m thinking I might just get it.

      • Here you go:

        Scottish caller: Boris Johnson would make me vote for independence | LBC

        This caller voted against Scottish independence in 2014 and couldn’t ever imagine changing her mind. But she told James O’Brien that now, she vote Yes to independence.

        Boris Johnson is visiting Scotland today for the first time since the general election in December and says that the coronavirus outbreak has shown the “sheer might” of the UK union.

        James was asking the opinion of Scottish callers to the trip – and received a series of people saying that they voted no in 2014, but have changed their mind now.

        Maggie called from Aberdeen and told James: “In 2014, if anybody had said to me that there would be a day when I would wish to leave the Union, I would have thought they were absolutely mad.

  3. He went to Orkney to avoid crowds booing him. He can’t be seen arriving to “save the union” to booing crowds. He may look like lard at was strategically poured into a cheap suit from Primark, but his handlers know how something like that would look. The tory sub branch are also well aware of how badly the message of we’re “Better Together” goes down, if the principle reason its dying, is booed and jeered in the streets. Not even Manky Jaiket man & his 5 pals could save him. So they send him to a creamery who will be utterly fucked by Brexit instead. And Captain Wiff Waff and his band of wee nabobs and gloat about how they pay for everything in Scotland. Oh What Jolly Japes.

  4. Prof. Curtis the psephologist was on the wireless an hour ago. Curtis stated that the recent rise in support for Indy appeared to be down to the pandemic (a reasonable assumption) but he stated that this was due to the “perception” that the pandemic was being handled better and that “until recently the data didn’t support this”. Really?
    The 7DRA for fatalities in Scotland has been around 2% of the UK figure for three weeks now (and it dipped below the 8%, per capita benchmark way before then).
    The 7DRA for new, +ve cases in Scotland has been 2% or lower than the UK figure for substantially longer.
    I’m not convinced that the Prof. is a dyed in the wool Unionist, but on this occasion he has a poor grasp of the statistics.

    Incidentally, we’re being excluded from the Irish “Green list” (no quarantine countries) due to the relatively high rate of new, +ve tests in the UK. In a direct comparison between Ireland & Scotland the new infection rate (corrected per capita) for Ireland is worse (3.96) than that for Scotland (3.22).

    • ‘ unroll recently the data didn’t support this ‘

      A tacit admission that indeed the pandemic is being handled better in Scotland, but of course preceded by the negative ‘ perception ‘ which has been the narrative for the last month or so.

      Johnson now claims the deep pockets of the English are paying for the success.

      I wonder if the media will notice the change in narrative.
      Curtis does himself no favours as a statistician or as a trustworthy source of information by his comment.
      British nationalist to the core and we can provide the data that supports that assertion.

      • If that is true (deep pockets of the English) then why is England not doing just as well? Surely they’re paying themselves? Is that not tantamount to admitting the English government has been useless?

        • Oh, we *know* they’re hopeless …

          Too poor, too small, too stupid Wales, eh?

          Wales gave more than 10 million items of PPE to England after they had trouble ‘organising themselves’

          Wales gave England more than 10 million items of personal protective equipment during the coronavirus pandemic, the country’s health minister has revealed.

          Mutual aid agreements in place with Westminster, Holyrood and Stormont saw nearly 15 million items of PPE, such as facemasks, gloves, visors and gowns, given to England, Scotland and Northern Ireland.

          Wales had received 1.4 million items of PPE from those countries in return, Health Minister Vaughan Gething said.

          He told a Senedd committee that the figures showed that inter-government relations had worked well during the Covid-19 crisis but suggested England had “significant challenges in organising themselves”.

          “Of the net figure though we’ve actually provided slightly more mutual aid to Scotland and Northern Ireland but significantly more mutual aid to England – we’ve provided more than 10 million items net to England,” Mr Gething said.


    • vivianoblivian7

      Yes I have heard this “perception” line a few times now in various interviews. Its quite clear “they” are trying to imply that Scotland isn’t really doing any better in handling the pandemic than England even though the poor Scots like to think it is.

      • True – CNN even did a report from Scotland this morning and it was the same two points – 1) perception and 2) the figures are really not any different between Englsnd and Scotland. Bloody nonsense of course.

  5. While Johnson polluted Scotland with his lies, Nicola was doing her job to the highest possible standards. Just another day really.

    The journalists wanted a reaction from Nicola to Johnson’s fiction. She kept it short, to the point and honest. And she kept her focus superbly on the release of those shielding from lockdown.

    But beware. Boris has something up his sleeve. I think it’s his leg. Who dressed him this morning?

    • Och, Arthur, Brian Toodle Oo The Noo Taylor was wearing a new suit and was ‘Live’ on BBC Reporting North Korea today at lunchtime.

      Against a backdrop of exotic foliage, doubtless to disguise the fact that BBC Jockland is not that strapped for cash if they can afford to send Taylor to Orkney to ‘interview’ the Serial Womaniser and Father of Many, Brian dutifully churned out the Establishment ‘line to take’ before we were treated to Johnson himself trotting out he same tired old Better Together cack.

      I wonder how much this farce cost the Scottish Taxpayer?

      Sally McNair anchored, and as they say in these pairts, her face was tripping her.

      They headlined with the easement of lockdown for 180,000 shielded Scots, but omitted the headline Covid figures which contributed to such a welcome step.

      I know that BBC Jockland read WGD.

      So, for the teatime bulletin, here are today’s figures.

      No new deaths overnight. Only one death in the past 15 days.

      16 new cases overnight, 4 associated with the Privatised Test and Trace centre, at Sitel, while the number in hospital is down to 287 and only 2 in intensive care.

      But that’s good news..and SNP Goodery. We can’t have that.

      Surely this is vital information for BBC North Korea’s elderly viewers, some of the last information over 75 year olds who can’t afford a licence will get from Sally and Co.

      The tired old Hack Pack attempted to make today’s Update ‘Boris Day’, and the SUN Hack was torn a new erse by NS when he tried to turn the Public Service Update into a SNP Bad political dog fight.

      Why isn’t Scotland doing what England is doing is the diurnal dirge from the Dead Tree Scrollers?

      Any attempt to black out this daily Update would be the last straw.

      • I was well p!eased that Nicola was able to get the point over that the money from London is borrowed money and that Scotland could just as easily borrow it itself like every other country in the world.

        That simple message is dynamite.

        Of course the Brits will have a thousand “ah but” reasons why Scotland would have problems doing it but they have long since exhausted their supply of trust in the eyes of the public. The genie is getting out of the bottle.

        They might try a covid news blackout in Scotland. Would they really be that stupid? I don’t know which way I want them to jump any more than they do. Lolz.

        For quite a while we have been in heads we win tails you lose territory.

        It’s still excruciating listening to the evil bar stewards though, Jack.

        • Westminster does not borrow money, the Central bank of England just prints more, nobody in their right mind would lend a bankrupt Britain anything.

        • Arthur, How tired and spent Sally and Toodle Oo looked tonight on the BBC North Korea edition of the Johnson Show.

          Surely it’s time for them to plod off to the Dun Roamin haven for tired old hacks?

          Johnson was in a Blue Tory niche on the isles waving crabs in the air which will of course rot on the quay in 5 months time as the EU slams the door shut on Merrie England.
          BBC North Korea edited in a butcher’s apron fluttering from the mast of a boat.

          He was at Lossiemouth with the khaki boys sabre rattling and reminding us as if we needed being told, that we are a militarily occupied colony, and good old BBC North Korea got a wee soul in Elgin to vox pop a ‘silent majority’ dig . We are all backing Johnson apparently.

          The Carnival Folk have been left high and dry by the BAD EssEnnPee, and Sally mused that there will be outbreaks when the Schools returned in August.

          Can’t be long now before the last helicopter takes off from the roof of BBC North Korea in Pathetic Quay.
          Perhaps they’ll move to smaller premises when Donalda MacKinnon effs off in August?

          It is alarming that this fat bloated man can come to Scotland and leave unscathed, having not met a single soul outside a carefully selected bunch of the ‘right people’ and Magnusson describes it as ‘Boris Johnson visiting Scotland’.
          We live in a tightly controlled colony with the Scotia Branch of the Elite doing their part for England.

          Our entire MSM had nothing to comment on?

          I better save this post lest it disappear into the Infinity cloud.

          I mentioned ‘militarily occupied colony’ in another post, and it got lost in the ether.
          I repeat how many tens of thousands of our money did this farce of a Butcher’s Apron jingoist nonsense did it cost us Scots?

          And my TV Tax pays their wages to feed me lies and English Nationalist fervour.
          Brian Taylor, it is not ‘the Treasury’s money. It’s mine, and that of 5.4 million Scots which will pay for Covid 19. You know that, yet you cannot say it out loud.
          Oh, me hercule, as the Eton toff would gasp.

  6. Great stuff as always Paul, esp. when it comes tae Doris 😀😃😉😂😂😂 reposted on Indy2 ✊👊✌💙💚💛❤💙

  7. There is a possible joke in there about the photo of Johnson with crabs, but I just can’t think how to phrase it.

    • At least one … there’s a clean and not-so-clean one about ‘catching crabs’ or ‘catching a crab’, I guess.

      And then, you’d do good to remember that the Welsh word for ‘a crab’ is ‘cranc’ – pronounced how you’d expect in a language which has no letter ‘k’ … 🙂


      • Student to teacher,
        Sir what’s the difference between a crab and a spider?
        Teacher, Crabs walk sideways, spiders don’t.
        Boy turns to pal,
        See told you you’ve got crabs.
        Sorry couldn’t stop myself.

  8. How is Boris going to try and convince the people in the nation of Scotland to stay in a union with him when he is on record in 2004, writing what he would do to Scotland and its people,
    Why would we trust someone that not only thinks so little of us, but of our nation.
    Perhaps someone would be kind enough to put it up on here, as my knowledge of this computer thing is not very good,

    • In case anyone hasn’t seen it already:
      The Scotch – what a verminous race!

      Canny, pushy, chippy, they’re all over the place,

      Battening off us with false bonhomie,

      Polluting our stock, undermining our economy.

      Down with sandy hair and knobbly knees!

      Suppress the tartan dwarves and the Wee Frees!

      Ban the kilt, the skean-dhu and the sporran

      As provocatively, offensively foreign!

      It’s time Hadrian’s Wall was refortified

      To pen them in a ghetto on the other side.

      I would go further. The nation

      Deserves not merely isolation

      But comprehensive extermination.

      We must not flinch from a solution.

      (I await legal prosecution.)

    • James, any normal person would start by humbly apologising for all the disparaging remarks he has made about Scots and Scotland. That, however is never going to happen with Johnson because he is an English supremacist and they just don’t do that sort of thing. He is used to Scots Tories bowing and scraping to their Westminster masters eg arch groveller Mundell.

    • James LBJ didn’t write ‘The Scotch – a verminous race’ (so they say). It was written by James Michie a staff writer for the Spectator and published by the moron in 2004 when he was editor of the Spectator. If that had been written about anyone else such as Jewish or black people the public would be having convulsions, however it’s just the sweaty jocks and we don’t matter. That ”satirical poem’ should be sent out to every household in Scotland, imo. Let everyone know what he thinks of us.

  9. I think Yes Orkney and the other Orkney organisations did us all proud today,
    I doubt if Johnson/Cummings had any real concept that even in a ‘far flung’ (his thinking, not I hasten to add mine) outpost there would be such opposition to him.
    The pictures and tweets are excellent – and he did get booed!
    It was just great – thank you Orkney.

    • YES thank you Orkney.
      The YES group up there have a tough job to do because there’s a large British mostly English population there, a good few English folk moved there over the last three decades and set up businesses which is great but they will always vote against Scottish independence.

      I look forward to the day when people in an independent Scotland will be able to retire to England in their fifties and by a house twice the size for half the price and live on the profits or start a wee business with a Scotland flag flying high on a flagpole at the bottom of the garden.

      • Well the last census[0] has it as 79% White Scottish and 18% White Other British, and yet despite that presumed 20% English, the vote was around 67% No (turnout 84%) : 10004 NO, 4883 YES.
        So the 15k voters there will not really have any impact upon the overall result.

        I rather suspect the issue with Orkney is the view of identity. Supposedly most of them think of themselves as primarily Orcadians, secondary as Scots, and presumably tertiary as Brits.


        • Yes JB but that census you quote was done ten years ago .
          That last census figure you quote actually showed a rise of 4% from the previous census of twenty years ago , of English folk in Orkney

          I think it is certain that the increase in English folk moving to Orkney over the last decade will be even more than 4% so your 18% will now be about 23% or more.

          • Terence, I see you are not missing any opportunity to inflate the numbers of English in Scotland.

  10. Those who lend money look for assets to protect their investments.
    You can borrow against Oil reserves.
    You can borrow against whisky in bond
    You can borrow against forestry etc etc

    You cannot borrow against stock market gambling.

    That is why the hold tight.

    • Spot on Julia!

      The north sea oil reserves is like having hundreds of billions in gold reserves.

      Oops! Gold, didn’t Gordie Broon sell it all to save the banks. Oh well!

      We never need to to touch it, just leave it there and borrow off it and if we need to pay off some lending just sell a share of an oilfield.
      Anyway, the new commodity will be energy, especially renewable energy which costs peanuts to produce once you’ve laid out the costs of the initial infrastructure, which can be funded initially by the oil.
      And Scotland is already a net exporter of energy and we’ve only just scratched the surface of what’s attainable.
      We can be exporting energy to all over Europe in the future and the EU know this and Westminster knows this too.
      England are net importers of energy, they don’t produce enough for their needs and if we leave the UK the borrowing clout of oil has gone, they’ve already sold off their gold reserves and they have to pay for our energy or the lights go out all over Englandshire.

      To coin a well known phrase ” Never before has so much been owed by so many ( England ) to so few ( Scotland)
      They need us a lot more than we need them.

  11. Today’s Daily Telegraph – now more of a Brexit newsletter than a newspaper admittedly – reported that Johnson “believes he can win over Scotland.”

    Either this is a sign of just how large his ego is, or he is living in a parallel universe.

    Elsewhere in the media today, The Guardian’s Simon Jenkins has an article which claims that “Only money is holding the Union together now.”

    • Jenkins may just be close to the mark if that’s what he claims.

      Contrary to their John Bull sh.., the Brits don’t like parting with (other people’s) money. They just like to pretend, like they did with Northern Ireland.

      • Thanks for that. I had the briefest look and now realise that he’s actually just another clueless walloper. But it’s reassuring to see that they are still clinging to their delusions.

      • I just finished reading Simon Jenkin’s article before coming to this site. Some whoppers that demonstrate clearly that he has not got a very firm grasp, or in fact any sort of grasp, of things Scottish. The Guardian knows it too because comments have not been opened on the article.

        • Legerwood,

          Same old, same old: (aka ‘Know your enemies, Scotland – Exhibit 1 241b’):

          Sir Simon David Jenkins FSA FRSL (born 10 June 1943) is a British author and a newspaper columnist and editor. He was editor of the Evening Standard from 1976 to 1978 and of The Times from 1990 to 1992.

          Jenkins chaired the National Trust from 2008 to 2014. He currently writes columns for The Guardian.


          Jenkins was born 10 June 1943, in Birmingham, England.[1] His father, Daniel Thomas Jenkins, was a professor of divinity at Princeton University.[2] He was educated at Mill Hill School and St John’s College, Oxford, where he read Philosophy, Politics and Economics.[1]


          Jenkins has written several books on the politics, history and architecture of England, including England’s Thousand Best Churches[12] and England’s Thousand Best Houses.[4] More recently in his A Short History of England, he argued that the British Empire “was a remarkable institution that dismantled itself in good order.”[13] He wrote that England is “the most remarkable country in European history.”[14]


        • I have just read some of Simon Jenkins article just now.
          I find his view of Scotland absolutely repugnant and clearly both biased and misinformed.
          As you say the Guardian has not opened comments – and no wonder – we’d be all over it like a dose of salts!
          However if the Guardian is going to commission and publish inaccurate baised ‘opinion’, it should allow rebuttal.

          • The Guardian is no longer what it was but has become a pseudo-progressive mouthpiece for the establishment – and as you point out never allows comments on anything contentious that might lead to a different viewpoint than its own coming out. Even where it allows them, comments have been known to disappear and not for the normal reasons for deletion. Almost worse than an openly right wing rag.

      • Jenkins aricle is a shocker. Got to the bit about the GERs figure and exploded and stopped reading his crap article.

        Sick sick sick of these bloody GERS reports. Scotgov bin this propaganda now.

  12. Just saw Jamie Greene on Sky news… Not entirely sure a facepalm emoji would cover Mr Greene’s performance. Oh, and yes. Yes, the ‘once in a generation’ meme was trooped out…. Yet again.

    Y’know, it’s amazing how little grasp of language/democracy/reality your average Tory policy gonk has.

    Spooky, but true.

  13. I love the expression ‘End Of The Union Show’ – It’s a definite keeper and lends itself to being trotted out frequently to great and humorous effect.

  14. The First Minister should say, on behalf of the majority of the Scottish people, I hereby repeal the Treaty of the Union Of the two Parliament, so that the English taxpayers do not need to subsidise Scotland.

  15. The Emperor paid us a visit today. Britnats got their knee pads on and their tongues coated with boot polish. The only exception was toodle oh the noo – medical exception.

  16. Thanks Paul.
    Social media has been having loads of fun, crabs an’ a’. I would like to post loads of links, but would end up in arbitration, instead imagine of one the best which features a familiar figure stranded on a zip wire strung between the mainland of the island of Hoy and the Old Man of Hoy.

    However, John Crace’s article in the Grauniad is quite good.

    Recursively, in the comments I have put a link back to the WGD.

    • That’s a great article bedelstan so much so that I reckoned that John Crace, who’s on the ball there, must be Scottish but seems not.

    • Nicely done there.

      It’s been a long while, but if the article hadn’t already been closed for comments, I would have added “Wonderful new planes you’ve bought for us in the pic there. I didn’t realise you had commissioned ‘Boris Spitfires’ just as you had with ‘Boris Buses’!”

  17. The Orkney protesters had a great time unfazed by the wind and rain. Seems the butcher has crabs now 😂😂

  18. Those ‘broad shoulders’ that give such great support sagged somewhat in March 2020 when the UK almost ran out of money. Quantitive easing by the Bank of England then and since have kept the UK afloat but those broad shoulders have sagged somewhat and show little sign of recovery.

    Interesting in Sarah Smith’s report BBC News at 6 o’clock when she interviewed the shop owner in Orkney, who was definitely not Orcadian, about the monetary help from the UK Gov. Yes she said it was useful but we pay taxes so we should get help. Then the owner of the winery in Perth who said it’s our own money we are getting back. Telt.

    Ch4 news tonight Ciaran Jenkins asked a group of Yes supporters in Orkney about Johnson and they burst out laughing. He wasn’t best pleased. Then Keith Brown and Prof Sirdhar were interviewed and did well.

  19. The Cheek of the local Tory MSP I can’t be bothered looking the tossers name up any way it’s two barrled type , apart from loosing his deposit he somehow managed to reduce the Tory vote in successive elections I guess he didn’t take the hint the first time , I imagine if the Clown stands again Tory support will disappear completely , yet another Tory to slither in the back door at Holyrood, just like Tomkins – Wells – and oh course the undisputed champ Murdo who has never won any election he has contested, what do these Clowns have in common ? Simple
    THEY WERE ALL REJECTED AT THE BALLOT BOX as were many in their scabby party don’t they get it Scottish people don’t want their party, their leader, their whole political outlook , it’s not wanted how many times do they need telling

  20. Johnson picks up crabs in his visit to Orkney. What a front page headline that would make – go on The National give vent to your latent Sun type journalism – just this once.

  21. Ciaran Jenkins Reporting for C4 news from Orkney about Johnson’s visit says:

    ” hardly his happy place. His Tories lost almost half their Tory seats in the General Election.”

    The Tories had 13 seats they now have 6 – poor Ciaran cannae count. They lost 7 seats Ciaran – 7 is more than half. This is his job – political reporting.

    So has Ciaran just made a simple mistake or is he at it like they always are – their mistakes strangely enough always favour the Britnats.

  22. The last famous Johnson to tour the Highlands was equally scathing of the Scots and Scotland, for example declaring that there was no such thing as Gaelic poetry but this circus of the absurd version goes further declaring that there is no such country as Scotland at all.

    While the first used his Boswell to shaft Scotland this panto version uses his to shaft anything that moves.

    Lock up yer daughters and livestock.

    • The last famous Johnson to tour the Highlands …


      were there not many other famous johnsons [lower case chosen deliberately] who jave toured the Highland since Dr S?

      I’m thinking of, say, at random, D. Cameron, G. Osbourne et al.

  23. Ciaran Jenkins in the same report from Orkney on C4 news with another pork pie. Telling two porkies in the one report – accidental mistakes ??

    ” even though deaths overall, if not lately, are at worrying levels in Scotland as in England.”

    Total mince Ciaran – you are a Britnat propagandist or a useless journalist. No scrub that you are both.

    What part of the UK no longer reports on the coronavirus statistics – England – wonder why? Ciaran will be along soon to do a Trump.

  24. Remember Teresa May? She “visited Scotland”, and met wee Ruthie in a hut in a forest.

    What is Teresa doing now? What is Ruthie doing now?

    Johnson now travels farther along the “visit Scotland” farce route and poor Jackson Carlaw doesn’t feature.
    What will Johnson be doing soon? And if the voters sit down and study the pros and cons of a Indy List Only party, then Carlaw will be selling…something, or other in 2021.

    Nicola nailed the money borrowing issue well today. Issuing government bonds for cash reads like an euphonism for issuing an IOU with interest payment due, attached. Inflation protected?

  25. i’ve read that the Japanese government is heavily in borrowed debt., and issues government bonds to raise capital and the primary purchasers are the Japanese people. I would have no problem if my Bank, pension fund, even little me bought government bonds in an independent Scotland. An expressed act of confidence. And patriotism even?

    • National savings Investment is the equivalent for UK savers, you actually get interest. Your saving with the gov, around £130 billion in the fund and it can’t go bust, it is effectively an argument that austerity was a lie.

  26. I just had to access BBC I player and hear Naga Munchetty’s startling comment when interviewing Ian Blackwood this morning.
    Yes she did say when pointing out that the UK gave Shetlands £50 million to match the SG £50 million that if Scotland were independent we would get nothing.
    They really are arrogant idiots now, aren’t they?
    She actually believes that she and her fellow English citizens are giving Orkney millions of free money as a gift from England the bountiful.

    Why Blackwood didn’t point out that it was our money we were getting back beats me.
    The sooner we break off from this nasty wee nation the better.
    BTW EU talks have crashed and burned.
    Time to stock up on toilet rolls

  27. Douglas Ross Tory MP Moray, made a complete arse of himself on C4 news. He says with a straight face that the Scotgov just followed the UK gov. Now like all Britnats that is what he wanted to be the case but it wasn’t and still isn’t.

    ” the Scottish government and the UK government have been pretty much in lockstep throughout this pandemic”

    “….she has followed the UK and the decisions made by the UK government almost completely”

    Douglas, funny how your fellow Britnat journalists have on a daily basis questioned the FM on why she is not doing the same as England.

    Classic Tory guff from Ross defending England against Scotland. You would almost think he was an English MP.

    Just to confirm he is a total arse he repeats the referendum/ generation lie.

    • Well in reality what has she done that is different – they both neglected the care homes – apart from play-acting what has she done that is so different from Boris?

      • Actually that’s not true, the transfer of patients from hospital to care homes was in truth accepted practice, adopted by almost all states across the globe to 1) reduce the risk of infection to the elderly because of the anticipated influx of Coronavirus infected admissions. 2) Free up beds for emergency admissions due to the virus.
        Testing was a major problem, firstly because of accuracy and secondly test data wasn’t shared by UK gov.
        Scotland at no point had shortages of PPE, the private care sector failed, I repeat failed to comply with the advice and instructions issued to care homes regarding PPE, it has been determined that the major cause of the spread of infection within private care was due to staff transfers.
        Lastly the methodology for the recording of deaths due to the virus in England was the polar opposite of Scotland’s. The methodology recommendations from the Silver swan 2015 pandemic resilience exercise were put in place at the beginning of March and recorded all deaths where Covid was present, England didn’t, and as many if not more than 20,000 deaths were left unattributed.
        There is and was a hell of a difference.

        • Agreed on the initial care-home transfer, the retrospective view on testing is a political construct which ignores the agreed national policy of the time, symptoms-> Test. Could SG be more enlightened than they were? No.
          The science has moved on, the political opportunists have not, but please spare a thought for the countless care-workers who lost clients and friends, forever tormented by “what-ifs” only to now see their former clients and friends become a political football. It is contemptible.
          There is a lessons learned review to come from this pandemic in due course, I can but hope the morally vacuous seeking to score political points are treated to the contempt they most certainly deserve.

      • ”Well in reality what has she done that is different.”

        She’s been standing up most days of the week, for months now, sending out a clear message to the Scots in an attempt to save lives. Where’s Boris? Mostly skiving and in fact was campaigning in Scotland yesterday when he should have been in London dealing with the worst crisis to hit the UK in a century.

        ‘Scotland’s Covid-19 death rate falls to a third of that in England.’

          • ”Nobody even knows what covid-19 is.”

            Try telling that to the families of the NHS and Social Care workers who have lost a loved one due to CV19, never mind the nigh on 70,000 families across the UK. There is no comprehensive figure of NHS/SC staff deaths although we know that it stands, at least, at over 300 individuals. I don’t remember hearing, over the years, of NHS staff dying in their workplace whilst nursing their patients for any one of a multitude of conditions. Do you and if not how do you account for what’s happening now?


          • It is utter bollocks to say “nobody even knows what covid-19 is”. Scientists and medical experts know *exactly* what it is. It’s a disease caused by exposure to one of the viruses in the coronavirus family. In suspectible individuals it can be extremely serious and it is far more lethal than the flu.

            Mind you, you yourself suffer from an unexplained affliction. It’s your bizarre addiction to ridiculous conspiracy theories. I’m prepared to be tolerant of your conviction that *the deep state*, *the establishment* or *the illuminati* are deceiving us all in some global conspiracy when it’s only politics that you are talking nonsense about. But in this case your ego-centric conviction that you know more about a potentially lethal disease than experts do is dangerous because it puts other people at risk.

            You once said in the comments on this blog that you “can’t help what you believe in”. Well you can. You are not a victim of your beliefs, you are an active agent in your own belief system. So in this blog at least you can stop with your unscientific conspiracy theory crap about a disease that is killing people.

          • Well said WGD. In the USA complete nutters are being encouraged by the King of Nutters Trump with all their Qanon crap theories. Most of them need medical assistance but in the UK that comes with a high price tag so they go untreated.

            If Johnson follows Trumps path then we are all in deep shit.

      • J Galt away and have a look at the journalists questions from the daily briefings complaining about the FM diverging from England ( as mentioned in my post above). Initially the FM tried the 4 nation approach but soon realised that they were total herd immunity bampots in London. Jason Leitch also changed.

        So you think that it is just luck that Scotland has a much smaller death rate and low level of infection. Or are you like Trump it is a temperature difference thing – Scotland being colder.

        Thank goodness the FM did not act like Johnson. He made a complete bollocks of every aspect of the pandemic except the Nightingale hospitals but they were untested anyway and giving out dodgy contracts to Tory pals. He was good at the dodgy contracts – quite prolific actually.

        I think the other replies from Golfnut,Petra, Grizebard, jistjr cover anything else I might say in reply.

    • Yes, all that stuff from Jackless Carload about “how dare the Scottish Government not slavishly follow every miniscule diktat of the BoJo Empire?”, I must have dreamt it.

      Yes, social isolation surely must be getting to me. I’ll have to have a “wee dram” – oops, “little tipple” – of that British Whisky I have somewhere. If only I could remember where I last left it…

        • J Galt
          What Playacting??? Do you think this pandemic is a joke? or maybe a political game? If so I hope the joke is visited on you!!!

  28. All eyes on Doris in Orkney, while Cummings takes control of the economy and much more.
    Jeez this is getting exciting.

    • Golfnut,
      Couldnt Believe my eyes. Just saw siamese twin crabs on the news. They must have been siamese twins cos there was only ONE arse in the picture. Sure it was from Orkney???

  29. Something the assembled couch punditry and commentariat of the MSM may have missed. The political will and narrative of Westminster is massively anti- Scottish independence. The massed ranks of the UK’s media is anti-independence and is only too happy to use the language, right down to the soundbite du jour, of the Westminster bubble.

    The SG, despite having a distinct lack of such advantages, apparently have some fairly enviable approval ratings and the wider YES movement haven’t disappeared back into their shortbread tins. They’ve grown, diversified. Scottish self government/independence as an option, has become normalised, is becoming… popular under it’s own momentum.

    How is that remotely possible if your output is to be believed? (STOP LAUGHING AT THE BACK! And breathe)

    Probably worth a thought like, but constantly insulting populations (people) might not be the brightest of tracks to take. 😎

  30. The real outrage is not so much that the present bunch of EnglishTories treat Scotland with utter disdain but the fact that they can.
    It doesn’t matter who or what party is in charge at Westminster,they can do what they like with Scotland because they say so.
    In their minds parliamentary sovereignty trumps popular sovereignty.
    England’s historic “constitution” negates Scotland’s Claim of Right.
    Some union.

    • And what really annoys me bringiton is that one ordinary, wee ignoramus after another in London, in the main people that we didn’t vote for, make decisions that impact in the most hellish of ways on Scots lives. It’s been going on for decades, if not centuries now, and when they’ve decimated another area / s of our lives they just walk away, die off or whatever and up pops another. Sick of it.

      • As an aside to the general flow … I think the falsity of “equality” under the Union was hidden for many decades, even longer, by the localisation of much government until the late 20th century. Local government really used to have the power to make things happen for the local population in a way it no longer has. However what has highlighted the falsity of the Union has been the massive centralisation of power in Westminster since basically the Tories came into power under Thatcher (and also the increasing corruption with removal of barriers to easy moves between government and big business). Those great Thatcherites, Blair and Brown actually continued it – despite their allowing devolution this was brought about because they thought it would kill Nationalist movements off (and they thought Scotland/Wales would elect Labour forever) but didn’t really push or persuade the English regions to accept it – so in England government is completely centralised. They now want to roll back devolution and complete the centralisation.

  31. HAHAHA. That’s you telt. Then Ch4 presenter, Krishnan Guru-Murthy, changes the subject to Scotland and the slave trade before the Professor divulges too much. Bl**dy-well educates him. Surprise, surprise.

    ‘Professor Sir Geoff Palmer, Professor Emeritus at Heriot Watt University, compares Scottish independence with independence of former British colonies.’

  32. WELL worth listening to both videos.

    ‘Nicola Sturgeon has ‘followed’ the UK government over Covid response, says Conservative MP.’

    ‘Places that politicised their coronavirus response ‘have done abysmally’ – Prof Devi Sridhar.’

  33. Thoroughly enjoyed listening to the very informed charming Professor Sir Geoff Palmer’s interview with Krishna Guru- Murphy. Fantastic friend of Scotland.

    • Baxter soups £1.15 at all good Unionist supermarkets.
      Newgate soup (Kildare) at Lidl 0.35p

      Decisions decisions.

      Must be worth it to lose over half your customer base…
      Christos, they are getting desperate.

      • Baxter Soups, like Mackies Ice Cream – made by people who are shit scared that if the English ever found out they were Scottish, they’d stop buying their products.

        It took an independence referendum to show me that the only folk who had a Scottish cringe were unionists.

    • That gave me a laugh , however I had stopped having any interest in the company after their unionist declarations prior to the independence referendum. Nice to see that others will be joining my boycott .

  34. Boris Johnson’s trip north could have been a great success and he could have saved the Union, if he had paid attention to a very simple formula. The beauty of it is he’s so thick he wouldn’t have understood it, so it is with that in mind I’m publishing it anyway. It just requires 3 very simple stages:

    1). Immediately [REDACTED] franchise [REDACTED}, within 2 weeks.
    2). Promise – and fulfill the promise within 1 month [REDACTED} £10,000 [REDACTED].
    3). Watch carefully for [REDACTED} and when it appears as it will, just [REDACTED].

    It’s sad really that it actually is so simple, but even then too simple for Boris.

    • Yep, ‘ redacted ‘ has worked so well for them in the past, just how stupid do you have to be to get a job with Doris.

  35. A wee saying I hope I have got it right it’s fitting I believe.

    The English never remember & The Irish never forget.

    I believe this sums up this Clowns visit he believes any old tosh he has said and written in the past will be forgotten by the use his charm and sheer charisma ,

    Christ delusional doesn’t come close Johnston is a gift we should embrace every time he opens his plummy gob ding another YES supporter is converted .

    He is priceless I really hope the English media give him more coverage maybe throw in the odd cabinet minister as well just for a top up , these people are playing a blinder Nicola doesn’t have to do anything apart from tossing in the odd grenade

    • The English never remember & The Irish never forget.


      GIYF, Robert graham:

      ‘”The problem is the English can’t remember history, while the Irish can’t forget it”

      – Oscar Wilde
      (An Irishman)

      • Welsh Sion ! forgive my ignorance but what does GIYF mean ? , I appreciate your answer but I believe most people remember the simple version , I could be wrong and bow to people’s opinion as to the accepted version . As usual every day is a School day and we all learn every day .

        • GIYF – Google Is Your Friend (But I don’t mean it in a sarcastic way)

          It most certainly is mine – as I need it on a regular basis for my research for articles on here and in my professional life. (Hey, I’ve even worked for them for Welsh … !)

  36. Remember the real danger of GERs – it is not just the false representation. The term “according to the Scottish Governments own figures” is often used in the debate. Unfortunately that is an accurate statement and will be used constantly.

    Until the GERs construction/misrepresentation is rejected by Holyrood the nail will continue to be hammered.

  37. In other news.

    Finally, we ‘down here’ [Angloshire] will have to wear masks when we go into shops and takewaways from today … wonder where they, the … ahem … ‘powers that be’ stole that idea from?

    ‘Once more unto the mask, dear friends!’

    • ”Until all the Home Nations are given as much thought and investment as the Home Counties calls and support for independence will only grow.”

      They just don’t get it, do they?

  38. The Bank of England electronic “money” generation continues to blind people to reality. It is little different from the habit of shaving silver and gold from coins that had a true value in being precious metal.
    People realised that the coins true value was no longer represented by the content.
    The next con was to simply issue base metal and paper with a “promise” to the bearer.
    The BofE is now little better than a Ponzi scheme.
    I remember Wilson’s speech after the devaluation of the pond…”the pound in your pocket…etc”

    If you increase the amount of currency (paper or electronic) in the system against fixed assets and a declining GDP then your savings are going down, your wages are going down, your pension is going down.

    As with scraping a bit of silver from the coin the BofE/Westminster is taking bits of all our current wealth to maintain an illusion.

    Would you buy one of the U.K. Long term bonds ?

    Con men don’t wear jeans and T-shits. They dress in suits and drive expensive cars. From Aaron Banks to Dyson it is about “self”.

    The Bank of England is churning out Monopoly money and they know it doesn’t fool the financial markets of the World. However that is not they target of the game…the just want to fool US.

    who backs the Tories? Why do they back them?

  39. The express today

    Coburn says the SNP have bankrupted us.
    The ex MEP says it a ruse to stop Brexit.

    Maybe someone should tell both the express and coburn we’ve left the EU, only the transition period to complete along with the TRADE DEAL.

    The express printed this and no doubt paid coburn for the article.

    Maybe they are the NUTTERS the doris talks about on SKY today.

    The cat is out the bag on NO MONEY, you just borrow it from the BOE who print the stuff.
    The idea you TAX first and spend later is a myth, now we all know it.

  40. BBC Scotland The Nine

    “……and opinion polling suggesting support for independence has increased”

    There you have it :

    1. – the polling is only SUGGESTING but before when it was below 50% it wasn’t suggested it was polling IS against independence.

    2. – the numbers 5 and 4 54% just cannot be spoken by a Britnat now. It is obviously physically impossible for it to pass their lips.

    They keep on pumping out their propaganda and bias – some more subtle than others but they are losing despite their best efforts to mislead.

    • Yes, and on the EBC news they give the grim Covid death toll as a UK one, artfully managing not to mention that none of them are in Scotland, and haven’t been for a week.

      (It just wouldn’t do to frustrate the Tories’ frantic media attempts at equivalencing.)

      • Today on BBC North Korea, ‘the Chief Secretary (that’s Stephen Barclay nipping in to Scotland to for an hour filmed by BBC feeding llamas with ‘Union ‘Jack at ‘Gorgie Farm’) is meeting with the ‘Devolved Administrations’ later today’.
        Barclay on a charm offensive to save the Union?

        It is the ‘Scottish Government’, not an ‘administration’, BBC .

        Drip drip drip; undermine and demean the democratically elected government of Scotland, why don’t you?

        The British Administration boasting that England was once again ‘giving’ their money to Too Poor Scotland.

        Well done, Pathetic Quay, the Brit Nat propaganda outlet that still couldn’t give us the Daily Update Covid 19 figures for Scotland; it’s not really ‘news’ unless it’s BAD EssEnnPee news, is it?

  41. On place names. My Mum aged 86 retired history teacher, worked with another teacher who was a native Gaelic speaker, similar age. This lady spoke of a new road being built in the western isles and what it should be called. The locals formed a committee to decide on the new road’s name but they could never agree. Eventually the locals called it the ‘Co-mi-ty’ Road. Co-mi-ty being how local Gaelic speakers pronounced the English word, ‘committee.’

    One other house in the isles was called locally in Gaelic, ‘the house of the square bums,’ as the old toilet was outside, away from the house, and the old faither refused to buy a toilet seat, as he thought this would make his lazy sons sit too long on the lavvypan, when they should be out working the croft.

    Perhaps apocryphal tales but ma weemaw swears its all true.

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